I have recently discovered something about myself. For some reason, I am able to go see a movie and enjoy it even when it is purley awful, but acknowledging the fact that it is the movie equivilent of (forgive me Honora) a Harliquin romance.
You know the ones. They used to sell for 99 cents but now they're up to like $3.50. They are maybe 150 pages long and everyone on the planet can recite the plot. Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in LUV, conflict happens to split up boy and girl, conflict is overcome and they have glorious sex and live happily ever after.
Van Helsing is basically this. If you completely empty your mind of all thought and try not to be logical then you can enjoy the movie for the spectcale that it is.
On the other hand as I was sitting there I came up with the perfecct use for this movie. When it comes out on DVD, rent it, have a party and make sure everyone has a very large bottle of their favorite drink to get drunk on.
I present to you:
Now granted, I've never played one of these games before much less written one, so feel free to add on and please overlook the flaws.
1) As the credits roll take a drink to get you started. Don't worry, it won't be your last
2) Every time there is a new creature who doesn't belong in a Vampire movie, take a drink
3) Every time you recongize something stolen (plot, character, technology etc) from another movie or book take a drink
i.e. when you recognize Q take a drink
4) When a scene ends exactly as you predict it will take 2 drinks
5) Every time you look at your watch and wonder how much longer the movie is, take 3 drinks
6) Every time they break one of the "rules" of vampire folklore drain the glass
There you have it. It's a very simple game. If you follow the rules you should be plastered by halftime.